Maple Bacon & Cooking with Friends

So David explained his reasons for cooking bacon in the microwave and it all came down to “prevents grease spattering  on the oven walls”.  I have let this sink in, and my reaction remains the same — you don’t cook food with the ease of the clean-up being foremost in your mind; you cook food with the quality of the flavor and eating experience foremost in your mind.  Or anyhow, that’s how it works if you’re not Dutch (he would tell you that his Dutch ancestry governs his determination to assess things according to tidyness.)

So I made the bacon again for myself today, on a rack over a pan in the toaster oven.  Hints from Heloise: you can tent the bacon with a square of tinfoil and Oh! Look! No spatters in the oven!  How about that.  Plus you throw away one square of tin foil instead of two pounds of grease-sodden paper towels that were wrapped around the microwaved bacon; the frugal among you will be delighted to be reminded that tin foil can be washed and reused, should you choose.

Now!  Now we have bacon worth the eating: light and crisp.  Remember, you are doing this especially for your taste-buds, since bacon is not recommended at all for any internal organ or bodily system.  So if it doesn’t taste exactly as exquisite as it should, then whatthefuck is the point of making it?  Well, there is no point, obvs.

In all other regards, Christmas dinner was very fine.


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